Modern Times – They are a changin’
Times are a changin’ and fast, faster, into absurdity.
Humanity is suffering through psychological and physiological sicknesses.
Anxiety, fear, anger and a general unwellness is becoming evermore commonplace in our lives. We have offers from therapy on-line, social media companies are being sued and wherever we look we see people staring into phones and bumping into lampposts.
What is actually happening with us?
We are distracted by thousands of things every day and are living in a dichotomy that many of us cannot see..
a separation of body and mind. A separation of humanity and nature, and a separation between us.
The way out is twofold.
- Become aware of where your body is, and where your mind is.
- Slow down. Deliberately and one step at a time. That is what this article is all about.
Wash, rinse, repeat. Step 1, step 2, repeat. We all need time to learn how to slow down. This is a journey, not a one-time quick fix.
If we are to define the most difficult and important part of the journey it is recognizing every time we are divided. The body doing one thing while the mind is somewhere else doing something else.
How to…
Later on, we’ll talk about a few tips from Zen, but for now how do we start?
Let’s practice slowing down physically. Instead of rushing around, as we usually do, let’s slow down the pace and begin to notice things. You can rush through the garden to get from A to B or you can slow down and practice awareness.
You listen, you see, you hear, and you pay attention to what it is you’re looking at, what you smell, what you hear, and what you see. Paying attention to the grasshoppers, to the bees, to the new flowers, the dandelions. What’s going on around you? Are the cardinals there? Can you listen? Can you hear the blackbirds?
This is also the perfect perfect time to stop and feel your body. Where are your shoulders? Are they hunched up? Is your neck tense? What are you doing with your breath? Are you breathing now? Take a few deep breaths, relax your shoulders, your face, your jaw. This process is called a walking meditation.
The great thing is; this costs you less than 5 minutes time.
Another way to slow down physically is when you are sitting. Turn off the distractions, take a few minutes without television, phone or music. Check your shoulders, check your neck, take a few deep breaths, and relax. Use another 5 minutes to just stare out the window and watch.
Now let’s take a look at some powerful Zen thoughts about slowing down. This is a list from someone on Pinterest or perhaps Instagram, I honestly cannot say anymore. I’ve kept it for a long time now, refined it for my needs, and am learning to apply it. Whoever put the original list together, kudos to you.
Zen Thoughts…
- Do one thing at a time.
Have you ever stopped to notice where your mind is? Ever driven miles and then realized your mind has been somewhere else the whole time? Here’s a truth for you; The body can be in one place, doing one thing, but the mind is somewhere else. Think a moment about how often you separate the mind from the body, how we live in two different worlds, the physical world and the world inside our heads. This is a dichotomy, a separation.
There was a phase I went through where I listened to many podcasts, about 24 with hundreds of episodes each. At the same time I was trying to write, or read. It doesn’t take imagination to know that you can’t listen to history and write about retirement at the same time. Practice doing one thing at a time with body and mind in unity. - Do it slowly.
One of the best activities to learn something about yourself is eating a meal alone. You may notice that eating is only one of many activities. You may be reading, watching TV or just somewhere else with your mind. The meal is over and you really didn’t manage to taste and savor any fork-full. - Do it deliberately.
Sometimes we find ourselves so far away from what our body is doing that the activity is mindlessly, offhand and without our full attention. An example here may be brushing your teeth quickly, or as in eating. (@ 2. Above) - Do it completely.
This is about falling prey to distractions. Something comes up, not an urgent thing, just a distraction and we’re off to checking our phones. - Do less.
Multitasking is not a bad thing, except that it’s not really possible. Trying to do it leads to the body and mind being out of sync. I told you about my podcast multitasking above. Sometimes we actually multitask doing nothing. TV’s on, we start doing one thing, get distracted and start doing something else. At the end of the hour we have multitasked nothing at all.
The key here is learning to focus and do one thing at a time.
Using some form of calendar is a great way out. It can be Google, paper or even just an index card for the week ahead. Each morning consider what should be done today, what you might do if you have time and what distractions may come for you.
Don’t overload your calendar. Very often we want 30 things done each week when actually we only need to get 10 things checked off. That’s the time to cut down to 15 things a week. - Create space between things.
I see this as a combination of a few thoughts.
For one thing minimalism, only owning what we really need and use. Beginning with furniture and whatever hangs on the walls, having space between things gives peace of mind. Compare this to a room overfilled with furniture and stuff that is never used. Clutter causes us to always be busy moving things around. Organizing and reorganizing.
Step by step, we can start selling, gifting, donating or trashing what we no longer need or use.
We can also create space between thoughts and action. For example when something happens to trigger anger, sadness or anxiety, we can react immediately or we can learn to create space. Even if that space is only a few seconds, we have created space. Now we can work on widening that space. I find taking a deep breath before responding helps.
The next area of space can be our minds. The so-called monkey-mind runs, jumps and screams about disconnected things all day long. It isn’t an easy thing to learn but it worth gold to create space enough in the mind to focus on a single thing.
Focusing your awareness on whatever is in front of you now – and on your breathing – creates space between what is and what the mind is doing.
- Develop rituals.
You might say that this is another form of habits, but rituals are different than habits. For example; you surely have a habit of washing your face and brushing your teeth in the morning. But that is not yet a ritual. Turning this habit into a ritual means slowing down and spending this time wisely. Use the time for a meditation on the feeling of the water on your face, use it to feel thankful for having running water. If that water is warm you can feel gratitude for that as well. Then you have turned a habit into a ritual.
The great beauty on developing rituals is discovering mindfulness – see number 3 Do it deliberately. We actually have many habits every day that we can develop into rituals, many chances to practice slowing done. - Devote time for nothing.
This is a challenge for the best of us. Once – or better more than once – a day taking a fifteen minute block of time for doing nothing. For me this is either walking or sitting and observing nature without distractions. No phone permitted. - Simply live – live simply.
We are talking about the sum of all the above. Try not to become an ideal consumer, chasing that shiny new thing. Learning more about nature is learning more about ourselves. Replace doom scrolling with just sitting quietly.
Just be. We can find immense joy in those two words – Just be – if we learn to do it often.
Conclusion
These are a few basic things to learn in order to slow down.
We have learned from a young age to be quick, to think about the future and to regret the past. To move from A to B without seeing, listening and being aware of the small beauties that surround us. We are distracted all the time and are losing touch with who we truly are.
There is a better way. Learn to slow down.
The very best way to do this is simply to become aware of the dichotomy between body and mind, and between our thoughts and who we really are; the observer of thoughts.
B4 You Go
Thank you so much for coming along this far. If you enjoyed the conversation, please try a few of the things you’ve heard, or read.
~A.J~